Timeline for How to stop family from pushing me to forgive and forget?
Current License: CC BY-SA 3.0
28 events
| when toggle format | what | by | license | comment | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Dec 22, 2022 at 7:18 | history | protected | CommunityBot | ||
| Dec 13, 2022 at 12:26 | answer | added | gnasher729 | timeline score: 0 | |
| Jan 19, 2018 at 22:03 | answer | added | Dan Anderson | timeline score: 1 | |
| Jan 19, 2018 at 21:11 | answer | added | Forklift | timeline score: 2 | |
| Sep 13, 2017 at 12:22 | answer | added | Christian | timeline score: 0 | |
| Sep 13, 2017 at 1:15 | answer | added | user5631 | timeline score: 3 | |
| Sep 1, 2017 at 21:43 | answer | added | Adam Davis | timeline score: 0 | |
| Sep 1, 2017 at 21:30 | comment | added | Em C | @MageXy I've thought about this, actually. I think I'd be sad at the finality, but she hasn't been part of my life for nine months now. I feel like I've already grieved to some extent.. all the stages.. even things like feelings when I hear songs from a concert we attended, or meeting someone with the same first name. Of course it's hard to know for sure when it's just a hypothetical. | |
| Sep 1, 2017 at 21:03 | comment | added | Mage Xy | Something that might give you some additional perspective: No one lives forever. Your sister might be hit by a bus tomorrow. Would you feel any regret having avoided her this long? I only bring this up because I'm going through something kind of similar - my parents are divorcing due to some extremely horrible decisions on my mom's part. I don't forgive her for what she's done to our family, but I'm trying to make an effort to talk to her cordially once a month or so, because I know that if something were to happen to her, I'd be devastated despite the wounds she left us. | |
| Sep 1, 2017 at 20:55 | answer | added | the_SJC | timeline score: 1 | |
| Aug 31, 2017 at 23:37 | comment | added | Catija | Hey all, please remember that we're here to help the user with the question they have asked. This requires that we accept their decision rather than trying to argue with them about it. Whether their decision is "right" or not, it's irrelevant. We need to look at the information we have and either give a solution or not. As Em C's comment before this one shows, judging decisions makes people less willing to be open about the situation. | |
| Aug 29, 2017 at 20:56 | comment | added | Em C | @DanubianSailor that sort of comment is exactly why I didn't want to discuss the details here. The situation is quite painful and personal, and there are great answers that didn't need to know exactly what happened. | |
| Aug 29, 2017 at 20:42 | comment | added | Fiksdal | @EmC Alright, I actually guessed that the story was that your sister got romantically involved with your ex-partner. That would be very hurtful indeed. | |
| Aug 29, 2017 at 20:32 | comment | added | Em C | @DanubianSailor I thought perhaps my family and sister didn't understand why it hurt so much. When I told my parents, my mother said "oh. that changes everything." But when I told my sister, she said "duh, I knew that, do you think I'm stupid?" and ended the call by telling me she didn't know how I could sleep at night because I was such a horrible person. That was the last "real" conversation we had. | |
| Aug 29, 2017 at 20:32 | comment | added | Em C | @DanubianSailor I was trying to avoid that debate. I am working through my feelings with a professional, and while they are encouraging me to move on, they have also confirmed what she did was very hurtful. But OK, I came up with an example: Imagine your best friend going behind your back to date your ex. Can she date who she likes? Yes. Can I feel upset and not want to be around them? Also yes. Now add family and conservative religion into the mix.. | |
| S Aug 27, 2017 at 3:24 | history | suggested | user288 | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
added country info
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| Aug 27, 2017 at 0:01 | review | Suggested edits | |||
| S Aug 27, 2017 at 3:24 | |||||
| Aug 26, 2017 at 21:59 | vote | accept | Em C | ||
| Aug 26, 2017 at 19:59 | answer | added | TOOGAM | timeline score: -4 | |
| Aug 26, 2017 at 10:06 | answer | added | English Student | timeline score: 1 | |
| Aug 26, 2017 at 8:20 | comment | added | Fiksdal | I realize you intentionally avoid describing what your sister did to hurt you. While I respect that, I think you might get better and more informed responses if you do share it. | |
| Aug 26, 2017 at 1:36 | answer | added | Tycho's Nose | timeline score: 15 | |
| Aug 26, 2017 at 0:14 | comment | added | Vality | I cant answer your question as to what you should do. But I made the clear statement a relative did need to be cut out of my life, and anyone who did not respect that decision would be cut right out with them. The majority of them dropped the matter, the rest I was better without. | |
| Aug 25, 2017 at 23:40 | answer | added | threetimes | timeline score: 4 | |
| Aug 25, 2017 at 20:51 | history | edited | Em C | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
tried to make wording less awkward
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| Aug 25, 2017 at 20:03 | answer | added | Maxim | timeline score: 16 | |
| Aug 25, 2017 at 19:21 | answer | added | Joel Harkes | timeline score: 19 | |
| Aug 25, 2017 at 18:50 | history | asked | Em C | CC BY-SA 3.0 |