Do you know what the one thing you should definitely not say when you get in a car accident is? "Sorry." Because regardless of your role, you're implying feelings of guilt.

Don't explicitly say "sorry" - focus on picking her up in other ways. Make her feel like it's alright to have messed up (because it really is... everyone does it from time to time, and she's already been punished for it). I wouldn't mention the written warning, but maybe just say something like:

"Hey, about what we discussed the other day - I just wanted to let you know that my role in trying to help everyone meet the same customer service standards has given me a lot of time to see everyone's mistakes... We all make them. Don't sweat it too much. Let me know if you're ever unsure of anything, and I'll do my best to help you."

Here are the reasons I suggest this approach:

• You solidify your stance that you were just doing your job without expressing remorse for doing so (which means that you will still be using the same discretion going forward)
• You express that she's not alone in messing up (everyone does it!), which should help take the pressure off of her as a single example
• You offer to explain any questions she may have on her performance in the future, which will help your working relationship going forward

Most importantly when you say this, don't say it with an apologetic tone. If you feel bad, she will probably feel bad. People pick up on tones. Instead, just say it in a calming manner. You're just 'letting her know' or 'dropping some friendly words' as you would to a friend having a bad day.

Personally, I think what you feel is natural. I'm sure she does feel a little down or embarrassed, because of the warning, but if you give it a few days (even without saying anything) everything will likely go back to normal and the impact on her will be minimized back down into nothing.

Do you know what the one thing you should definitely not say when you get in a car accident is? "Sorry." Regardless of your role, there's a potential that saying the word 'sorry' could be mistaken as a sign of remorse for your actions.

Since you don't feel sorry for performing your job as expected, don't explicitly say "sorry" - focus on picking her up in other ways. Make her feel like it's alright to have messed up (because it really is... everyone does it from time to time, and she's already been punished for it). I wouldn't mention the written warning, but maybe just say something like:

"Hey, about what we discussed the other day - I just wanted to let you know that my role in trying to help everyone meet the same customer service standards has given me a lot of time to see everyone's mistakes... We all make them. Don't sweat it too much. Let me know if you're ever unsure of anything, and I'll do my best to help you."

Here are the reasons I suggest this approach:

• You solidify your stance that you were just doing your job without expressing remorse for doing so (which means that you will still be using the same discretion going forward)
• You express that she's not alone in messing up (everyone does it!), which should help take the pressure off of her as a single example
• You offer to explain any questions she may have on her performance in the future, which will help your working relationship going forward

Most importantly when you say this, don't say it with an apologetic tone. If you feel bad, she will probably feel bad. People pick up on tones. Instead, just say it in a calming manner. You're just 'letting her know' or 'dropping some friendly words' as you would to a friend having a bad day.

Personally, I think what you feel is natural. I'm sure she does feel a little down or embarrassed, because of the warning, but if you give it a few days (even without saying anything) everything will likely go back to normal and the impact on her will be minimized back down into nothing.