Wife and I raise our kid together. Most of time it works fine, but it's very hard to change those of her behavior that I find unacceptable.

Let's say she does the cooking. She's been liberal on eating time, having dinner at 5pm one day and 9pm another day. It's ok for me cos I can eat myself. But I want her to have dinner ready at say 7pm every day for the kid. Now every time I raise this issue to her, she'll get angry and refuses to cook the next day, "you want that then you do it yourself". As the argue becomes worse, she'll simply lock herself in the room and leave the kid entirely to me for a whole day "as a punishment".

What's the best strategy to ask someone to improve their job while relying on them to do it?

Wife and I raise our kid together. Most of time it works fine, but it's very hard to change those of her behavior that I find unacceptable.

For example - let's say she does the cooking. She's been liberal on eating time. Sometimes she'll have dinner ready at 5pm one day and 9pm another day. It's ok for me because I can eat myself, but I want her to have dinner ready at say 7pm every day for the kid.

However, every time I raise this issue to her, she'll get angry and refuses to cook the next day, saying that "if you want that then you do it yourself". As the argument becomes worse, she'll simply lock herself in the room and leave the kid entirely to me for a whole day "as a punishment".

What's the best strategy to ask someone to improve their job while relying on them to do it?