I'm hosting an event in a couple of weeks - my son's first birthday party. I have several people who I would like to invite. Unfortunately, some of them don't get along. This seems to be a one-sided disagreement - meaning that Person A doesn't like Family B for some slight that Person A can't get past. I'm not involved in the disagreement and don't completely understand it but my husband and I regularly interact with both Person A and Family B and would like to invite them both to the event.
Neither of these parties are family. They are both friends. Person A was in our wedding and Family B hosted our baby shower for our son, so both are part of our close circle of friends. Person A did not attend the baby shower but that was at Family B's home while this event is at our home.
So, I see a few ways of this turning out.
I invite both but don't tell Person A.
Person A may or may not get grumpy at me for not telling them in advance but they are both at the party. Person A may depart early rather than being around Family B.
I invite both and tell Person A.
Person A will likely not come to the party. I would be disappointed in this outcome. Person A may still be grumpy at me for inviting Family B, "preventing them" from coming to the party.
Don't invite Family B.
I've already given an invite to Person A, so the opposite of this isn't possible. This feels like I'm getting in the middle of the "feud" and picking sides.
So, how should I handle this? Is there some alternate solution that I'm not seeing here? I don't really feel like I should be even having to deal with this. They are all adults, so perhaps I'm over-thinking things. I trust them all to be gracious at the party and not make a scene, so perhaps option 1 is the best choice... but I feel like full disclosure might be more fair to Person A.