I'm a bridesmaid for my friend's wedding. We have known each other for 12 years and I have been friends with her and her sister. I was not born in the country we are currently in and I have a different ethnicity. Unfortunately, the country I am from is experiencing tensions with country I'm living in and where my friend is also/the wedding is. I have lived here since I was 8 and I'm a citizen.
At the bachelorette party I tried to make conversion over dinner and mentioned that I have a friend in the military who has mentioned that people shouldn't contact her as she goes through training. I mentioned this and the bride yelled in the restaurant that I can't contact her because I'm from the country I'm from. The bride is the military and is serving currently and I know she hears a lot about the country where I'm from. Bridesmaid_2 told the bride that what she said wasn't very nice and tried to explain. I didn't say anything, only bridesmaid_2 who is also an immigrant tried to explain the situation and mentioned to the bride that it was rude what she said.
Maybe it is my fault because I never spoke to them about these comments, but I feel like if I have been friends with them for 12 years and in 2019 that they don't know that these comments are rude then maybe they will never know? It kind of makes me not want to continue this friendship especially since I have been friends with them for 12 years and I don't want to be in a friendship where I have to filter my words just so someone won't mention how I'm different.
I would appreciate some advice on how to address this issue. How do I speak to her about this issue and about how her comments might be insensitive?